Welcome to another entry in the “Tanya forces herself to write something” category. This one came to me while I was thinking about my circle of friends. I have a healthy circle of friends and consider myself lucky to have an awesome group of people who I get to live this wacky life with.

This post doesn’t cover all of that though, it won’t go over every type of friend I’ve ever had, because it would be exhausting, and I don’t subscribe to that.

I’ve noticed that I have certain archetypes that some of my friends fall into. Broader than “I have a best friend and 5 other close friends”, or you know, the “reason, season or lifetime” categorisation. So, while the actual people/faces change, the archetype remains.

Whatever, I drafted this when I was sick and it’s now the last day of the month and I gotta publish something. I don’t owe you an explanation, you’re not the boss of me.

The Obligatory Male Friend
This one is kind of self explanatory, for as long as I remember I’ve always had a close male friend. Generally existing as part of a wider group, of predominately females or gay men, there has always been the Cis-Straight-Male Friend. This friend has been my go-to for stereo-typical men things – building computers, fixing cars, making sure my trampoline doesn’t fly away (you get the drill).
Attributes/Traits – knowledgeable, honest, reliable, loyal, laidback

The “Are You Really Friends” Friend
This is an interesting one. In high school this was the person who wasn’t in my circle, but probably knew more about me than my close friends. As I’ve aged though, this person is someone I’m close enough to that I call them a friend (not an acquaintance) however we don’t necessarily exist in the others circle. We could go weeks or months without speaking or catching up, and others might not even realise we were close. Our friendship is usually one on one.
Attributes/Traits – Trustworthy, meaningful, unique

The Work Best Friend
We’ve all got this person – don’t we? Some of my closest friends these days started out as my work bestie. Whether it was smoke breaks, lunch or just sitting near each other, we went hand in hand. The Robin to my Batman, partners in sarcasm and sass. When they’re sick or on leave, you feel the loss (when I was in the call centre, my team leader knew that if my work BFF wasn’t in, I would not work as hard and wouldn’t make my sales). And then… Times change, jobs change and you’re no longer part of the day to day. That person either evolves into one of your core friends, or they live rent free in your memories of better, or sometimes worse, times.
Attributes/Traits – sassy, sarcastic, in the know

The You Plus Me Equals Trouble
Oooph if I had dollar for every time someone said to me “You and Blahblah are trouble” or “You guys are so mean together” I would have many dollars (so many dollars that I’d never have a Work BFF again). This is probably partly a character flaw of mine, but that’s not what this is about… There are some people, going back to high school, who when we were together….. ooooh girl, the sass. (I say sass, and not mean). We’d be an amazing comedic duo who were always up for mischief. Whether it was unplugging someones keyboard and watching them flail, or whether it was being hilarious in the face of boredom, we brought out the absolute best (and worst) in each other. Attributes/Traits – Smart, Mean, Sarcastic, Sassy, Mischievous

The Lifer
As friends move through the roles we make them – the work bff, the best friend, the anything – they either move on in their lives to bigger and better things, or they fall into this category. They become a lifer. A person who isn’t part of your day to day, isn’t your best friend, and isn’t someone you catch up with regularly – but when you do it’s like no time has passed and you both find that groove and revert to your old selves. They hold a special place in your mind, heart, soul because even though they aren’t in your inner circle, their friendship helped you be a better person.
Attribute/Traits – N/A

So, in writing all this I have a thought. Have I just looked for friends who fall into “approved” categories in my mind? Like, am I just chasing friendships that have died, by replacing the person with a “recast”? Is it like when they replaced Pippa on Home and Away with Pippa 2 (Upgrade)? OR is it like when they replaced Declan in Neighbours with Declan 2 (Downgrade)?!!

Till next time, have the day you deserve.

TT